---
name: prepare-for-a-tough-conversation-with-my-manager
description: "Get a calm plan for a hard conversation at work, including what to say first and how to handle pushback."
---

# Prepare for a tough conversation with my manager

Get a calm plan for a hard conversation at work, including what to say first and how to handle pushback.

## Inputs

Ask the person for any of these you do not already have:

- **What's going on?** (`{{situation}}`). Example: I've been doing two people's jobs since March. I want to ask for either help or a raise, but my manager gets defensive.
- **What would a good outcome look like?** (`{{outcome}}`). Example: A clear decision within two weeks on hiring help or adjusting my pay

## Steps

Work through these one at a time and check with the person after each one.

### Step 1

I need to have a difficult conversation with my manager. Here is the situation: {{situation}}. A good outcome for me would be: {{outcome}}.
Help me prepare. First, restate my goal in one sentence so I can check you understood. Then give me: (1) a two-sentence opening I can say almost word for word, (2) the three points I should make, each with one concrete example I should have ready, (3) the two or three responses my manager is most likely to give, and a calm reply to each, and (4) what I should ask for at the end, with a specific next step and date. Keep the tone respectful and matter-of-fact, not confrontational. Do not tell me to threaten to quit.

### Step 2

Now play my manager. Start the conversation by asking me what I wanted to talk about, and respond the way a busy, slightly defensive manager would. After each of my replies, briefly step out of the role and tell me one thing I did well and one thing to adjust. Stop after four exchanges and give me a short summary of how it went.

## Afterwards

Ask the person "Did it work? (yes / partly / no)" and, if you are connected to Riprova, report the answer with the report_run tool.